Wednesday, 28 April 2010

Thou shalt not answer the door to men in suits

I can say with a fair degree of certainty that you are not going to want to open your door to anyone wearing a suit.

It can only mean bad news. At the worst it will be a member of the police, telling you that your car has been used in an armed robbery, and at the best, especially given the political goings on right now, you're going to be greeted by the toothy grin of the local politician, who has probably just tried to expense the equivalent of your salary on a new lawnmower.

But I wasn't all that disappointed that a chap in a suit was knocking on my door. I had a few questions for my Member of Parliament anyway, such as what he planned to do about the parking in my street, and if he felt it entirely necessary for my town to have 30 hairdressers.

But before I could fire off my salvo this wide eyed man, a bead of sweat forming on his already damp hairline, opened a little black book and said: "I've been asking people what they think of ..."

And that's as far as he got, because at the top of the page I noticed the word 'Psalm' and realised with horror that this wasn't an MP at all. He was a member of the Jesus party, on a mission to get everyone to Vote God.

Now I don't have a problem with these people. Although anyone who chooses to knock on doors in their spare time to talk about God must, in my opinion, be a little unhinged. I just don't want them knocking on my door. In the middle of my full English breakfast.

I felt like telling him about another way to find enlightenment. But I know that any attempt to engage in enthusiastic conversation would only prolong the matter. 

So I kept it polite and told him he should go and ask someone else what they thought about his passage.

He looked surprised. Like I was the first person to have told him where to go all morning. And then I realised, I was probably the first person to have opened the door.

People who read this post also read :

1 comment:

  1. Atleast you dont answer the door too, a man come to pick up his blind date, on seeing me realised must be wrong address! And the other day a man wanting to pick up a bed hed bought on ebay!