Monday 18 January 2010

Esther! I didn't know you cared!

If I was to compile a list of all the celebrities I would like to meet or become associated with, Esther Rantzen wouldn't be on it.

I have nothing in particular against her, but when I think about it, she does annoy me a little.

It would appear, however, that Esther doesn't feel the same. Because she is now following me on Twitter. There she was scanning the trillions of members and I shone out like a beacon from among them. My dull, unregular posts would have indicated a person not chained to the necessity of updates, rather someone with some semblance of a life. Someone who has not the time nor the inclination to post every waking minutae of my existence. "Here," thought Esther, is a man I need to follow.

Before you bombard me with your thoughts to the contrary, you should know that I know that this is not the reason Esther Rantzen is following me. In fact she probably doesn't even know she is following me, because one of her minions in her 'Esther 4 Luton' campaign camp has been trawling Twitter and hitting the 'follow' button of the followers of other people, and then the 'follow' button of them (and so on, to infinity. What a job). It's nothing personal, it's a numbers game. That's how this thing works.

And that is why Twitter is essentially utter nonsense. It is nothing more than a different way to clog up another one of your inboxes with information that you have neither the time nor the inclination to read.

And just for the record Esther, if you do per chance ever happen to stumble upon this blog, I want you to know that I don't consider myself a fan on any level, don't live in Luton, and wouldn't vote for you if I did.

But thanks for the follow, all the same.

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